Death note Talk Show
by R and E
Summary: ...it's a death note talk Show i'm not explaining what it means **Light bashing!**
1. Chapter 1

Death Note Talk Show

Introduction:

The hostesses of this show are E and R (Real names not allowed do to Kira ***cough* "**light.")

Kinichiwa light are you ready for a lot of pain? Light: No T^T

R: don't worry light you're not the only one doing this. Every one else is too. E: you will just feel most the pain :D

Rules:

1.) No repeating dares.

2.) Try not to kill the characters please. (Except Light)

3.) If you value your life, don't get to possessive of Near or L Thank you :D

4.) Keep it T rated.

5.) Other than that you are free to do whatever just don't rape them. D:

6.) L did you know gods of death love apples ^.^'

7.) Neither of us have read Death Note: Another Note but we'll do B.B.'s personality as best as we can

Misa: Won't this be fun?

Light:No TT ^TT

Matsuda: Yay I'm in it! :D

L: so in other words shinigami's love apples?

R: Yes that's what it says doesn't it?

E:I think I'll like this. * Hugging Near *

Near: can't breath….

Matt: Noes I died T^T * he's playing Zelda*

Mello: oh great O_O

Mikami: GOD!? * Tackles Light *

B.B.: what the jam am I doing here help me * clings to Mello's leg *


	2. Chapter 2

Death note talk show chapter 1

R: first of all we are having a spelling bee we'll start off easy on light

B.B.: I already had my knife ready :(

E: Okay Matt spell cat hey I rhymed

Matt: (thinking)_ I'm probably not going to win so…_K-A-T cat. I'm outta here. Heh I knew there were 2 T's.

R: ... okay Matsuda spell Triskaidekaphobia

Matsuda: T-R-2-x –y- f -d-s-h-d-#-D:

R: I think I broke his brain.

L: what brain did he have?

R: You're so mean

L: And I'm proud of it

R: okay light spell stupid

Light: M-I-S-A

R: well… that is true but wrong Light

Light: I had a chance * walks back to the couch*

R: Near spell Thalassophobia

Near: T-H-A-L-A-S-S-O-P-H-O-B-I-A

R: Correct

Near: :D

R: I think we should put Near as the winner

L: what about me?

R: we all know you would win

Mello: I'm here too

E: But Near is better :D

Magical voice coming from the ceiling: Guys you're on

E: *gasp** *** Bob?

Light: No you idiot Bob Is my bestest friend; he's a wall

E: THE WALL THAT YOU FUCKIN LOVE!?:D

R: we'll be there in a sec Aizawa

Light…umm…ON TO THE REVEIWS!

E: (mutters) Imagay won't answer my question…

**xL-iz-After-BeyondBirthdayx**

**O.O Yah! Aww, you haven't read Death Note Another Note yet? Dang! YOU HAVE TO READ IT! ^^ *Glomps BB, L, Matt, Mikami, and Matsuda* I LOVE YOU GUYS!**  
**^^ I HAVE DARES FOR YOU PEOPLES! *Does BB's 'kyahaha' laugh* xD**  
**L, I dare you to handcuff yourself to BB :]**  
**BB, Huggle L :] OH YEAH! And tell him you LOVE him :3 Ima fangirl :3**  
**Light, I dare you to hug BB :D**  
**Mikami, I dare you to glomp Bb and give him a kiss ^^**  
**Matt, I dare you to kiss Mello ^^ Sorry Ima fangirl xP**  
**Misa, Go out with BB :]**  
**Near, huggle MATT! OH HELL YEAH!**  
**Okay...that is all :3 haha**

R: it should be you guys haven't read it I'm here too

E: my parents won't get me the book D: L you have to handcuff your self to BB~

L: I'd rather not.

E: TOO BAD THE REVEIWER SAID YOU HAS TO

L: fine

L: can you get me out of this R?

R: sorry L I signed a contract

L: what contract?

R: um… the contract that says looks Kira * points to light *

Light: I AM NOT Kira

R: that's something Kira would say ^.^

E: near don't hit your self with your action figure

Near: but IM bored

R:well go hug matt

Near: but I'm not gay

R: it's just a hug no one is going to post it on the Internet

Mello: awe

E: * clinging to Near's arm* nuu

R: it's just a hug

E: T^T I dun care

R: * chains E to a bicycle rack * there

E: D:

Near: do I really have to?

R: yes or else no Optimus prime for you *holds up limited edition Optimus prime action figure *

E: *some how unchains herself from bike rack * NU! *Tackles Near *

L: at least you don't have to say I love to a deranged murderer

R: your going to say I love you to a flock of ravens _ha B.B.'s a flock of ravens_

L: *sighs * no I mean B.B.

R: I know but that was payback for Matsuda

L: so you like Matsuda now?

R: no

Matsuda: awe

R: B.B. get over here

B.B.: yes

R: *hand cuffs B.B. to L *

L: you're so mean

R: don't blame me

L: do I have to say it?

R: yes

L: B.B. I love you *says really fast *

R: *takes hand cuffs off *

Light: *tries to hug B.B. *

B.B.: *tries to stab light *

Light: *runs away *

R: wait come back he only wanted to stab you *chases after light *

Matt: do I have to kiss Mello?

E: I guess so

Mello: what kind of sick and twisted person would do this to us?

E: …Yaoi fans * shudder*

R: * shoves Mello into Matt and runs *

Mello: get back here you twit

R: I'm not a pregnant goldfish

E: sorry we can't find Mikami right now he's hiding from the men in white coats

Mikami: (hiding in a corner) _Delete!_

Misa: why do I have to go out with that thing *points at B.B. *

B.B.: I'm not a thing

R: there's a fine line between insanity and smartness B.B.'s over to Mr. Insanity

E: L found Mikami! *L dragging Mikami by the arm * It turns out he was actually hiding from the dare.

Mikami: Nu! God help me!

E: It would help if Light were god.

Light: what I heard my name?

R: I'll give you a new pen if you do it

Mikami: ohhh new pen * kisses B.B. and runs away with his new pen*

R: I'm going to go see how Misa and B.B. are doing come on L

L: why do I have to go?

R: cause I said so

L: ok…

*Walks in shopping mall *

R: if you hear screaming that's B.B.

L: I know

Misa: *in clothing store * doesn't Misa look pretty in this dress?

L: where's B.B.?

Misa: * shrugs shoulders*me don't know I lost him walking by a knife store

L: that's just great

Back at the studio:

Near: * building house of cards *

Mello: * walks over to Near's house of cards and kicks it*

Near: D:

E: *hits Mello with Harry Potter book *

Mello: that hurt…

E: it was supposed to

Mean while at the mall

R: B.B. put the knife down your dates over

B.B.: yayyyyyyy! * Runs back to studio*

B.B.: A!

A: your alive * hugs B.B *

R: well… next reveiwer

**Savannah**

**Yay, Matt's there :D  
Light: I dare you to sell your Death Note on Ebay  
L: I dare you to buy it  
Matt: You get free video games! :D I dare you and Mello to play laser tag.  
BB: I dare you to go to the zoo and put strawberry jam/blood on all the big cat's mouths :D**

R: wow Matt you have a fan

Matt: I fell special

Light: do I have to sell my death note?

R: Yes, that's what the reviewer says

Light: ok * walks of to computer* T^T

E; He's acting like his pet just died or something.

L: ooh look notebook * buys notebook*

R: oh my god help me

R: I'll go see how B.B. 's doing E you take over here

E: Okays

At zoo 

B.B.: here kitty nice kitty * puts jam on lion's face*B.B.: that wasn't so hard * cat jumps on B.B.* * B.B. tries to stab lion *Zookeeper: do you know that guy?R: nope * walks away casually

***Back at studio * **

E: is BB ok?

R: Eh, he'll be fine

E: oh ok

R: how's L doing?

E: he figured out that it was Kira's notebook

R: L hand me the note book

L: No, it's Kira's

R: Kira is right in front of you

L: *gasp * your Kira I've been living a lie?

R: no I'm not Kira I mean the idiot standing next to me

Light: you couldn't be Kira any way not saying I am though

R: all's you have to do is write in you gay notebook planning out how you want your utopia to be then die and become a epic failure!!!

E: …And eat chips! Don't forget that!

Light: that was deep R

L: … I didn't know she could be so mean

R: E go take Matt and Mello to laser tag

E: Okays

E: come on Mello Matt

Matt: noooo!! I have to beat the boss!! * DS game over*

Mello: chocolate

AT laser tag

Mello: Were is he?!?!?!

Matt: Mwhaha * shoots Mello with laser*

Mello: I'm hit! Nooo *dramatically fakes death *

E: Drama queen.

Matt:_ this is like a video game but without the controls _

Scores

Matt: 10000

Mello: 1

R: wow Mello's losing I thought he'd be great at this

L: I know

At laser tag room

Matt: Yay I win!!!!!!!

Mello: damn you Matt

R: this episode was dedicated to our 2 first reviewers

xL-iz-After-BeyondBirthdayx and Savannah please message and review

E: This was brought by Doritos and Raven and Eurus please review or or or I'll sic Mello after you and he'll eat all your chocolate :D

AN: please try to stay away from the yaoi we'll deal with it the best we can but at least_ try _to tune it down on the Near and L yaoi we dun like the thouht of our faveorite charecters being gay D:


	3. Ballerina on Times square

Death note talk show chapter 2 Ballerina on New York's time square

R: Yay they listen but we still need more reviewers T^T

Light: no don't listen to her she's evil, evil I tell you

R: light did you read the six Harry Potter book?

Light: No,not yet. why?

R: Dumbledore dies

Light: noooo Dumbledore

E: did you read the seventh book?

Light and R: no

E: dobby dies

Light and R: *at same time * nooooooooo dobby

L: If there is, something that Light and R can both agree on it is the Harry Potter series

E: I agree

Aizawa from inter com: you guys are on

L: ok Aizawa *dragging R*

R: T^T

E: Rave is a little out of it right now so I'll start the reviews ahem first review

**Savannah**

**Yay, Matt won! :D Yes, you do have a fan. ^^**

**I dare you to, uh... Play video games all day. No one is allowed to interrupt you (Unless it's a reviewer) ^^**

**Mello: Give a report on chocolate.**

**Near: Dress as a sheep for a day! xD**

**BB: Train a tiger for your attack-pet. I meant pet.**

Mello: that was all beginners luck

Matt: yeah ok

Matt: at least I have a fan

Mello: shut up

Near: at least I have a dare today

R: its ok Near we don't get dares either

E: we are part of the cast to well at least a little

BB: cool an attack pet _attack light * tiger jumps on light and tears his head off*_

BB: ^.^

A: we have lost BB to the dark side

E:Well they do have cookies...

L: Cookies? :D

R:They're probably poisoned.

Light: * L is about to eat cookie but puts it down* Damn.

Mello: a report on chocolate Yay * goes get his forth grade project*

R: …Ok…

L: I regret ever considering him as my successor

Mello: I can hear you!!!

Mello: *Ahem* Milton S. Hershey organized the Hershey Company (originally Hershey Chocolate Corporation) under the laws of the State of Delaware on October 24, 1927, as a successor to a business founded in 1894.

Mello: Hershey's chocolate was invented in the 1900's. For more information on the history of Hershey, visit The Hershey Company website. The Hershey Company,

100th, Crystal A, Dr.

Mello: Hershey, PA 17033.

The Hershey Company employs approximately 13,000 employees worldwide The Hershey Company does not own Cadbury Schweppes.

Mello: However, Hershey has license agreements with affiliated companies of Cadbury Schweppes P.L.C. to manufacture and/or market and distribute YORK, PETER PAUL ALMOND JOY and PETER PAUL MOUNDS confectionery products worldwide, as well as CADBURY and CARAMELLO confectionery products in the United States. Hershey's rights under these agreements are extendible on a long-term basis at the Corporation's option.

Mello: Hershey also has an agreement with Societies des Produits Nestle SA, which licenses Hershey to manufacture and distribute KIT KAT and ROLO confectionery products in the United States.

Mello: Hershey's rights under this agreement are extendible on a long-term basis at Hershey's option, subject to certain conditions.

R: wow Mello I didn't know you knew that much

E: it is his main turf chocolate (heh he said CARA_MELLO_)

Mello: Hershey's chocolate to be exact

R: where is Matt?

E: playing video games

R: oh

Near: I found a sheep costume-

E: NEAR!! *tackles near*

Near: O//O

E: ^///^

L: I knew she would do that

R: we all Knew

Everyone: *Nods*

BB: I'm back

R: back from where

L: please don't ask that question

BB: I trained my attack pet

L: I TOLD YOU!!!

R: well sorry…

BB: hey light come here!

Light: yes?

BB: attack Nami!!

*Tiger attacks light*

BB: ^.^

A: so that is what he smiling about

Misa: nooooooooo!! Light!!!

R: get'em boy ^.^

L: R likes Nami

E: good tiger *petting Nami*

BB: ^.^

Light: *shivering in corner*

R: next review

**~Rachy-Neko-Chan~  
**

**Ello there :3  
Light-I dare you to dress up as a ballerina and do the Macarena at Times Square yelling, "I'm Light Imagay! I like cows!" to everyone who walks by. And while you're at it, make a baby cry!  
L-I Dare L to huggles meh n_n Sorry, I'm an L fan-girl  
Mello & Matt- I dare you guys to switch addictions, So Mello gets Ciggys and mattykins gets chocolate ^_^  
Near-I dare you to dress up like a white puppy and lick the whole DN cast(and the hostesses, if they want ^_^)  
****Misa****-Give a lap dance to Mikami! xD  
BB-I don't know much about you, but I dare you to kick a guy in the balls, rip them off, chop them up, put them into some soup, and feed it to Light xD (Creative, eh?)  
Update soon :3**

R: heh Light's first embarrassing dare

Light: fine * goes and gets fifth grade play costume*

R&L: *laughs*

R: come on Light

Light: fine

**In New York Time Square**

R: Dance woman Dance!!

Light: I'm dancing jeeze

*Random person walks by*

Light: I'm Light I'm A Gay and I like cows

Random person: O_O'

R: sorry he just can't help it

Random person: put it on a leash

R: heh heh he called you it

Light: shut up

R: ok now make a baby cry

Light: *walks up to random person with a stroller * aw he's so cute

Random person: thank you ^.^ * vaults wagon drives by*

Light: blue one *punches baby*

Random person: :( *baby starts crying*

Light: *walks away casually *

R: nice going light

**Back at studio **

L: how was it?

Light: very embarrassing

R: it was funny

BB: maybe we should've put the other rule keep dares rated T

R: maybe

BB: to late now

Near: *walks in a puppy suit *

E: Aw, you are so cute ^///^

Near: thank you

R: now go lick the death note cast

Near: fine *walks over to Mello*

Mello: *punches in the face*

E: bad Mello * sprays Mello with a squirt gun*

Mello: leather isn't supposed to get wet

E: (sings) Man-whoooore~

Mello: I am not! *takes out gun*

E: * hides behind Misa* Shoot the slut! Not me!

Misa: Misa-Misa is not a slut!

E: oh yeah that's right! You're a whore, not a slut! :P

L: doesn't she have to hug me?

R: ok just a hug *sulks*

R: what are you feeding light BB?

BB: you don't want to know

R: O_O

Light: my thoughts exactly

L: I think that is one way to wrap up this set

a/n: thank you for reviewing death note talk show and sadly keep dares T rated that is all.

* * *

Backstage after the show:

E: *pokes Aizawa's afro*

Aizawa: What are you--

E: IT'S EATING MY FINGER!

Mello: told you Near fans are mental.

R: She's my best friend. *glares*

E: *frees finger from afro* Keep that thing on a leash. God.

Mikami: GOD!?!? :D

E: *petting Near's hair*

Everyone: ...

E: he has soft hair...


End file.
